I look like Luigi Mangione – and I got a hot date with a model who came into my DMs

I’m on a date with a model who’s way out of my league after a photographer snaps me trying to glam up some Italian country — all because I kind of look like Luigi Mangione.

We share a bottle of white wine at the hidden gem Inatteso in Battery Park City as she tells me she’s not convinced Mangione is the man who killed UnitedHealthcare CEO Brian Thompson.

My date doesn’t think the widely shared photo of the smiling suspect from a New York City hostel is actually Mangione — and let me assure you, it’s not me.

Soon we’re eating lasagna and having a flowing, flirtatious conversation that avoids any mention of politics. She even laughs when I try to make a joke and lets me tell her my theories about the New Jersey drone phenomenon.

I know the date is going criminally well when I talk for 10 minutes about The Telepathy Tapes podcast and she claims to find it interesting. I find myself thinking, perhaps like Luigi behind bars, “How did I get here?”

It all started with an Instagram post I made after receiving many comments in person about the alleged resemblance – from co-workers, friends, family members, bartenders, strangers, gym-goers, members of the clergy.

Honestly, I don’t even see it. There must be a few dozen kids I grew up with on Staten Island who are as close or as close as possible to being a dead mouthpiece for the alleged killer.

“I don’t look like the CEO killer, except I’m Italian,” I wrote in an ugly block caption superimposed over a half-hearted office selfie. “But thanks for telling me, some people.”

A handful of girls and a couple of guys took the bait and dropped flirtatious comments – but one girl in my DMs who I’ve chatted with before cut short the chase.

“I mean ‘eyebrows,'” wrote the stunner with +20k followers, punctuated by an eye emoji.

I didn’t keep my cool, but that didn’t seem to matter.

“With the whole country dying for Luigi, you’re all going to have a blast,” she pleaded.

I mentioned that The Post was thinking of doing a story about my alleged likeness and how it was a “hit with the women.”

“I volunteer to be part of the social experiment,” she wrote, and the deal was sealed.

We set up a date and I even got her to commit to being photographed, though she chose to remain anonymous for the sake of this story – fine by me as I don’t need any more of you Mangione lookalikes trying to slip in her DMs.

It was a great date – even the photographer said – and she’s a great girl.

Despite juggling several gigs and constant bookings, she even manages to find time to volunteer as a foster parent for homeless dogs – incredibly kind.

Clearly, way out of my league and of all people I think Mangione thanks for throwing some stardust in her eyes.

And we have a second date – no cameras for that one.